Sensitive topics not to bring too early in your relationship

June 13, 2016

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Relationships can be really lovely in the start. Yes, the starting phases of a relationship is always happy, exciting, lovely and whatnot.You will be in the stage where you are just getting to know about the guy and he is getting to know about you. There are no decisions, regrets or even choices that you have made yet in the relationship. But as and when time passes, you want him to see the real you and you want to be the same around him like how you would be with your friends. Certain issues may come up when you are your real self. Yes, not always does a girl put out her real self. This could be a major issue later in the relationship. But as a girl, there are certain sensitive topics and some things to avoid in a new relationship when it is not the appropriate time.

You are probably putting your relationship in danger or in harness in the process of trying to make it clear and alright. You try to prove certain things to him and bring out your real self only to realize that he is getting affected mentally. Why does that happen? Why do women’s hormones jump from one level to another as soon as they think they have reached a certain age or phase in life? Well, the problem here is not your hormones. It is your tongue. You need to have a control on the number of things you tell him. Too early in to the relationship, you cannot tell him certain things because it could freak him out. So, there are certain ‘no opening of sensitive topics’ in a relationship. We are going to explain to you whey these topics are a big no. So, here are some sensitive topics that you definitely cannot open to your partner in the early stages of your relationship.

1Ex-relationship

It is definitely not the worst of topics but let me tell you something. It is fine for you to want him to know more about yourself or your previous relationship. The thing women lose on is that, talking about your ex or the number of fights you had and the pain you underwent has nothing to do with building what you have with the current guy. You cannot assume that by telling the guy about your previous relationship, you can create an easy emotional sympathy with the current boyfriend. That is definitely not going to happen. Also, don’t mislead the guy by talking all the time about your ex or your ex relationship. This could be extremely sensitive and the guy may start to wonder if you still have abundant feelings on the ex. What happened between the two of you, can stay between just the two of you. There is no need for you to tell your current boyfriend about all this and trouble him or meddle with his head now.

Even if you think that you want to share more than necessary, trust me, the guy really doesn’t want to know. It is better for him to not know the various little things he did or didn’t do. So, always be on a watch when you start talking about your ex in the early stages of your relationship with your current boyfriend.

[Also Read – How to remain faithful in relationship]

2Your political stance

Well, this might sound extremely rare and funny, but there are couples who disagree and have been even broken up on this topic. Political stance is something very subjective and when you are in that matter, you should always keep in mind that each person has their own preferences. You cannot judge your boyfriend or offend him by saying that his desire to vote for a political party or a candidate is wrong. This is an extremely sensitive topic to start off with and you could be offending his interests. So, always try to stay clear off this topic during the starting stages of your relationship.

3Religious beliefs

Are you a very religious and spiritual person and you find out that your boyfriend is an atheist? Well, don’t thrust your ideas and beliefs on him then. If you believe in a certain thing and he doesn’t, it is totally fine because again, you are 2 different people and you can have your own preferences.

Trust me, if you either start thrusting your beliefs on him or if you try to dwell too much into his preference, it’s not going to end well. If faith to you is a major part or portion of your life, then it is better to choose a man who believes and accepts what you say. If belief is not a big deal to you, then none of this should be a problem. You better be very sensitive and realistic when it comes to religious beliefs.

4Your biological feelings

Well, early into the relationship, no one talks about babies or your wish to have a baby. Unfortunately, if you are in your late twenties or if you are in your early thirties, you will end up having a big time pressure of getting married or having a baby.

Your hormonal imbalances will make you do that. But, just because you are messed up biologically, you cannot expect a man who just entered your life to give you a child already. Wouldn’t that just freak the guy out? I get it that your clock is ticking faster and you have no time to think a lot now. But, that also doesn’t mean that you should put your feelings openly to the guy in the new relationship. This is an extremely weird and sensitive topic to open. You never know if the guy really loves you so much, you don’t know if he is ready for babies, you don’t know if he even wants babies. There are a lot of ifs and buts and nos in this topic.

If you really like the guy and you are planning on saying that to him, think for a minute. See if it is going to do any good to you, him or the relationship. If your answer to this is a no, then why even bother? Be very careful when you open such topics!

5Income related topics

It is fine to be curious about his earnings. It is fine to be curious and its stays there! You cannot go ahead and ask him his earnings and his spending. That is not right and in fact, we women will get a sexiest and talk about feminism if the guy asks our salary, isn’t it? It stays the same for the guys as well.

You cannot, just cannot compare your salary with his. If he wants to tell you, he will automatically tell you when he finds it fit. Don’t dwell into these personal details. Also, never compare! You are way too early into the relationship to even start talking money and crap. So, never compare or ask him why he earns so and so. That isn’t going to do any good to anybody or anything.

6Marriage

While it is okay to put out your interest that you want to get married someday, don’t say it out loud to him that you want to marry him now. That isn’t going to help him at all. It is best when you don’t put any kind of pressure over him on this one. It is highly important for you to understand that your relationship is fragile and new right now.Putting any amount of pressure can only make it too difficult for him and you. You don’t have to ask him anything related to marriage. If you are so much in a hurry, wait at least until a year to talk about marriage and life.

-Pavithra Ravi